Please Make: Taller Water Coolers

Could someone out there PLEASE make a water cooler where the spout isn't by your freakin' knees?! I understand that if you simply made a traditional water cooler taller, it'd be much harder to put the water jugs on top of it.

But it really woudn't be that difficult to use the water pressure from those giant water jugs to force the water up a tube and into a cooling reservoir that's around chest height, thereby eliminating the need to make the actual contraption any taller.

Thank you.

-e

Ghostface Isn't Pleased

Sales of Ghostface Killah's new album, Big Doe Rehab, apparently haven't been doing so well. In fact, they were so disappointing that Mr. Killah decided to address his fans in a video message. In it, he basically scolds the people who downloaded pirated copies of the album, saying at one point: "I thought y'all motherfuckers loved me, man."

I thought so too, Mr. Killah. I thought so too.



-e

Worse Korean Restaurant Name Ever

Now, I'm all for the spread of Korean culture into mainstream American society. Especially when it comes to Korean food. I love Korean food like a fat kid loves, well, Korean food. And I love it that K-town in New York is slowly expanding outward past the boundaries of West 32nd between 5th and Broadway.

HOWever... I'm just dumbfounded as to how this particular restaurant actually came into being. That is, the new Korean-themed Chop Suey that has just opened up in Times Square on the second floor of the Renaissance Hotel by Mr. Zak Pelaccio. CHOP SUEY?! You've got to be fucking kidding me. These retards couldn't think of a better name than that?? What the fuck does chop suey have to do with Korean food? That shit is CHINESE, dumbasses. But, then again, I suppose if we all look the same, our foods and cultures are probably the same too, huh? Assholes.

And just for reference, Wikipedia descibes the actual meaning of chop suey as such:

Generally, however, the name "chop suey" or "za sui", when used in Chinese, has the entirely different meaning of cooked animal offal or entrails.

I wish I could've been present at the meetings where the name was decided. I imagine their short list of potential names looked something like this:

- All Taste Same
- The Gourmet Gook
- Me So Solly's Sizzling BBQ
- The Chink House
- Puppy Chow
- Yellowman Meat Emporium
- Chinkity Chong-Chong Ching Chong Food

Hm. Come to think of it, perhaps Chop Suey wasn't the worst choice.

What a crock. I hope that restaurant fucking crashes and burns.

-e

UPDATE: I took a glance at the latest online Zagat user reviews. Most of them are negative or mediocre. Ha!